Monday, November 29, 2010

Why, why, why?

There is no point to this post. Literally, none whatsoever. I think that I am just tired. Physically and emotionally. I want to be somewhere in the future, but I know deep down that these steps I am taking now are crucial in order for me to achieve those goals. I just don't like waiting, those of you who know me should know that.
I think I just need a hug....or a stiff drink, I can't decide which would be better right now :)
I will keep going, I will make it through tomorrow, I will have an amazing future. I know all of these things, I just don't like the rocky nature of the path that I am traveling right now.

I think I shall credit my discontent to my lack of sleep. I think a bubble bath will make this crap go away. I shall try and melt away the stress of the day with lavender and ylang ylang.


Perhaps a hug AND a stiff drink.

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Holidays bring out the sap in me

Legitimately they do. Babies are way cuter this time of year, and I always get a little teary-eyed on the Christmas morning commercials...even if they are for Kay Jewelers. Yes, I am a girl and I know that this fits into the stereotypical "girl mold" but I can't deny my emotions on this one :)

So in other news, I'm pretty sure I've made up my mind about location...I'm not ready to leave yet. I feel like there is so much I have left to do and I don't want to leave before I've had the chance to do them. I think my problem is that I try waaay too hard to plan out my life. I am going to adopt a surfer's mentality from here on it. Just take what comes and ride the wave all the way to the shore. It's all good baby.
Happy Thanksgiving! Go eat some turkey. Or, if you're a veg-head like me you can have some of everything else that doesn't include flesh. Or be really smart and eat some of everything. (Can you tell I'm already hungry?)
PS: I am in serious need of a hardcore roadtrip, so if any of you blokes have any ideas you should hit me up with those :)

Saturday, November 13, 2010

It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year

I am heralding in the Season. The time has come, we have made it safely through last year's festivities and they have come back to brighten our doorstep once more. That's right, it's the Holiday Season once again. I find myself getting extraordinarily excited about life this time of year. The days are getting colder which offers many perfect snuggle opportunities, people you see are usually happy about one thing or another, and the amount of glitter and sparkle that is in every product is enough to start a glitter factory. I love it...I legitimately love everything about this season.
Something that I have realized this year; I really do appreciate all that my parents did to create a sense of magic throughout the Holiday season.
When I was a kid, I had the parents who went all out so that the season literally seemed magical. The Christmas "secrets" started well before Halloween, we have the super fun tree picking out/ decorating ritual that lasts well into the night, and we always drove around and judged which house lights were the best and which were too tacky to make it on the list. My dad pulls the whiny bit about putting up the lights every year, he is the only guy after all, and every year my mom plays the Martha Stewart card and decides what theme our tree is going to have. We, naturally, have to coordinate our wrapping paper to our tree's theme also...Heaven forbid they be mismatched ;)
I think I find myself thinking about all of this now cause I won't be with my mom and dad this Thanksgiving. Although this may not seem like a big deal to some of y'all, but it is my first time ever....In growing up, I appreciate all that my parents did to make each day of this season so special. I think it goes to show how much of an effect our parents have on the way we think and what matters to us.
Something to think about I guess. I will contemplate it  over a nice frosty glass of Silk Pumpkin Spice :)

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Badum-Ching

I am soooo ridiculously hyper right now and the only thing I can think to do is blog about random life tidbits.....
I am going to NYC next weekend, not to mention the fact that I am headed to Dallas tomorrow for a weekend of shopping and spa goodness. Gosh I love my birthday!

Anyhoo, so New York and I are going to have a delightful time. In the midst of the planning process, I realized just how much of a nerd I am. I am going to the Met, the NY Public Library, and vintage shopping.....Who does that? I am ridiculously excited about going and seeing a bunch of old manuscripts.

Sidenote: I have fallen back in love with tea...particularly chai.

Ok, the random spurt of genius has stopped. I am off to bed

Sunday, November 7, 2010

Life

Don't you just love life?
This time of year I can't stop dancing. I have a constant rhythm in my head and it inspires me to move. I can be walking down the street and all of the sudden I will burst into a random jig. Don't be alarmed pedestrians, I am not crazy...well not entirely at any rate :)

I had a thought the other day, it might have possibly occurred when I was doing the aforementioned jigs, I never really grew up.
Yes it's true, I have the body of a 21 year old and the vocabulary of a lady from the 1800's, yet I have the attitude of a 8 year old. I am happy about everything. I love the simplest of things...not even kidding, I get the biggest kick out of bubbles, sparkly things, and any type of fun dessert. I actually like this about myself, I think it has enabled me to come at situations from a positive angle when nobody else can. Recently, however, I think I have discovered a downside to this frame of mind. I find that I am a little naive when it comes to certain things. I always picture happy endings on every type of situation, and when it doesn't happen I get my hopes crushed. I tend to think the absolute best of everyone. I don't get suspicious of people, and because of this I can sometimes get taken advantage of. I don't really know where I stand on this whole thing. Growing up my mom always used to tell me that keeping your heart and emotions tender and "vulnerable" was a good thing. She used to say that it would make you more perceptive and sensitive to others. On the other hand, how much heartbreak can one person take? Honestly, I'm a little tired of being walked all over.

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Musings

I was talking to my aunt about this the other day and it has been on my mind lately. Self-Image can be a terrible thing. As women we have it really rough. For some reason we have horrid self-image. Now, some of you (supposed) readers might be protesting right now. "Not I! I love myself! I don't fit into that mold."
Pshaw.
It has been scientifically proven that women have worse self-esteem than men, and I know that each and every one of you at some time or another has downed on yourself about something.
Anyways, that was a little off topic.
What I want to know is, when did our perceptions get so warped? This conversation actually took place while looking at a coffee-table book of Renaissance paintings. For some reason, women today seem to think that we all have to fit into the same mold. Tall, thin, blond, tan, talkative, etc, etc. When did this become the norm? When did this become desirable? Do we honestly think that every man in the world is so shallow that he won't appreciate us for who we are? For that matter, why do we feel like we have to have a man in our lives in order to be considered beautiful?
I think I have just gotten to the point where I am so fed up with trying to fit into the standards that the world expects. I know this should have been a lesson that I learned long ago, but old habits die hard I guess.
Mom, if you read this....You were right ;)
I don't know if there really is a point to this post besides the fact that I felt like typing. I guess what I am trying to say is that we should be more focused on what God says about us then what the Society/Media/Everyone else says about us. You are the apple of God's eye. We are his favorite kids...all of us, and it's about time we (especially me) started embracing that.